Maxims gone wrong - TT #10

Here's another way of looking the situation:

  1. 1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the heck alone.
  2. 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
  3. 3. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
  4. 4. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, just miss a couple of car payments.
  5. 5. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
  6. 6. If you lend someone $20 and you never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
  7. 7. Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and holds the universe together.
  8. 8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
  9. 9. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
  10. 10. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back into your pocket.
  11. 11. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
  12. 12. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
  13. 13. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.


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Comments

Unknown said…
Wise words. Happy T13!
April 16, 2008 at 9:54 PM
marcia@joyismygoal said…
Goods ones i have finally learned #12
April 16, 2008 at 11:24 PM
amazingmusings.com said…
Can't help but laugh on the first one!
April 17, 2008 at 12:46 AM
Hootin Anni said…
One and thirteen...what a hoot.
A big howdy from this Texan here, to you!!!

My 13 movie stills is shared for T-13 this week. Come by if you can.

[ps...a clever, CLEVER blog title.]
April 17, 2008 at 4:23 AM
Angie @ Many Little Blessings said…
I've read most of these before, but it's been a while. Very funny!
April 17, 2008 at 7:47 AM
Misty said…
thanks for the laugh... I need to print it out and hand it to annoying people!
April 17, 2008 at 9:17 AM
Denise Patrick said…
So, so cute - and true. Thanks for the laughs.

Happy TT!
April 17, 2008 at 3:32 PM
Unknown said…
#5 and #8 crack me up - thanks for the laugh!
April 17, 2008 at 5:41 PM
Denise Patrick said…
Some very funny takes and some very wise words there. Thanks for the fun.

Happy TT!
April 24, 2008 at 10:31 AM
Anonymous said…
Ah yes, good ol' number 12. I NEED to learn this!!
April 24, 2008 at 12:30 PM
Lisa said…
Keep those coming, they were hilarious...

Happy TT!
April 24, 2008 at 12:34 PM
Firefly Mom said…
Great TT! These are hilarious. Another favorite of mine is "Never raise your hands to your children. It leaves your midsection unprotected."
April 30, 2008 at 11:37 PM
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