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Monday, May 12, 2008

"Mommy" wasn't on my Career Assessment Test

When I was in college, I had aspirations and dreams that did not include changing poopy diapers, wiping snotty noses, or even getting up at two in the morning to feed children that would bite me on my precious parts, thus expediting their weaning from nursing.

I was a choir maven. In fact, it was the only class I attended with any regularity my first semester of school. Choir and Swing Choir. After dropping English, Psychology, Algebra and Computers, those were the only 4 credits I managed to escape with those first few months. Of course, after my mother received report of this, I quickly found myself in the counselor's office getting myself a "career plan". I took an assessment test that showed I was best suited for "the performing arts" or "nursing".

I ended up having the best of both worlds, because I get to use them both with my children. Now that I've been a mom for a while, I thought it would be fun to go back and see where I stand today, after all these years. So I took this Career Assesment Test. Just to, you know, see how my current career choice as a stay at home mom measures up. I was shocked to see how many of these jobs I find myself working on almost a daily basis:

"You would most enjoy a career that allows you to meet new people. You would also be happiest in a career that allows you to be free and flexible, and allows you to be extremely creative. Some careers that would be perfect for you are:

(I can see this...since all they really do is take and fill orders all day. Check!)
(Yes, honey, I'll have that done right away for you!)
(I don't know where I filed that blasted thing! Do I have to do everything?)
Director (
Katie - you hit the bathrooms, AJ & Abby - clean your room, I'll just sit here with my cup of coffee and watch)
Recruitment Consultant
(Come on kids, you know the library is more fun that the zoo! We can pick out books about animals!)
(I promise that from now on, there will be no more yelling in this house)
(Okay, now when we go to Mrs. ____ house, be sure and tell them how much you LOVE being homeschooled and that you never miss a day because your mom is a taskmaster!)
Human Resources Manager
(What makes you think you're qualified to use my personal computer ? I mean, do you have any experience using one?)
Religious Minister (Thou shalt not hit thy brother over the head with the cat's scratching post.)
Teacher (Today kids, we're going to learn about the fundamentals of "How to efficiently clean up after yourselves in a timely manner!)
(Where were you on the night of April the 10th at 6:42 pm when my favorite bud vase went crashing to the floor?)
(Lara, my kids mind so well, I know you'll enjoy the three glorious days of watching them while I'm gone on my trip! They never argue with one another and are always so concerned with putting each other first!)
Consultant (Now, what you need to do is...)
Financial Adviser (What do you think? Money grows on trees?!)
Financial Planner
(Honey, we need approximately $4 billion dollars if we are ever going to pay off all this debt and see our kids through college...think you can do that?)
(shake it's just a little blood. Here, a bandaid ought to fix that right up)
Physical Therapy (Come on...walk to steps...that's it!)
Occupational Therapy
(I know you have shinsplints from all that walking to sell your candles - let's do some yoga together!)
Public Relations
(We are going to Church - not a barn storming - get some respectable pants on, son!)
Travel Agent
(We're going to get to see so many exciting things on this trip! And stay in hotels!)
Restauranteur ("mom...what's for dinner?")
Hotel Manager
(Oh, you have toilet paper in your bathroom. Our sincerest apologies. ~The Management)
Events Organiser
(First, we're going to eat, then we're going to drive 3.2 hours, stopping approximately every 30 minutes to let one of you use the facilities. When we arrive at our destination, you will be pleased to know that I have arranged for you all to stay with Grandma so I can get away with dad and stay in a wonderful hotel with room service.)

You are a great leader. You genuinely enjoy being around other people. Your relationships with others are very important to you. You love talking and meeting new people. You are very enthusiastic about work and about all that you do and have in your life. You love being the focus of attention. You enjoy a fast pace. You are very socially oriented. Therefore, you are much happier being with others than you are alone. You crave interaction with others.

You are very spontaneous and often act before you think. You are always quick to answer when you are asked a question, even if you aren't sure of the answer. It is easier for you to improvise as you go along. You enjoy thinking out loud, and are most creative when brainstorming with friends or colleagues. You enjoy being involved in many activities.

You are very easy to read, and often wear your heart on your sleeve. You are never afraid to tell people what you think. You are very empathetic and genuine. You can sometimes be seen as over-emotional or too involved by others. But that is only because you tend to get so involved in the things you do that they become personal. You want to be adored, loved and appreciated. You like to please others and to make sure people are happy.

You trust your gut instincts. You are easily inspired and trust that inspiration. You are very innovative. You analyse things by looking at the big picture. You are concerned about how what you do affects others. You worry about your actions and the future. You tend to use a lot of metaphors and are very descriptive and colourful in your choice of language.

You are very creative, and get bored easily if you don't get to express yourself. You like to learn new things. You don't like the same old routine. You like to leave your options open.

Am I really all of those things? No. But it's sure fun pretending - I like the girl they describe based on the answers I gave. Maybe I'll aspire to be more like her. If not, there's always theatre...


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Elaine A. said...

Wow! We SAHMs have a lot of jobs. And still we are only worth like $117,000 a year. Think about how much someone would have to pay all those people you listed!!

Hope you had a great Mother's Day!!

Cassie W said...

Gotta love those career tests! I've taken a number of them and each time find them extremely entertaining!

. . . Dallas Meow . . . . >^^< . . . said...

but what GREAT financial planning goals ;)
THANK YOU for the Mother's Day greeting.
You have no idea how much that meant to me.
What a sweetheart you always are!